Projecting the Knicks’ First Round Pick

In the aftermath of the least exciting NBA lottery of all time, one in which a handicapped 14 year old boy stole the show, Man Hub would like to present the case for who the New York Knicks should select with the 17^th pick in the 2011 NBA Draft. The draft is about a month or so away, so here is a look into 2 players who are currently on the Knicks’ radar. However, don’t be surprised if they end up drafting some 6’11” Frenchman who will end up with Vince Carter’s balls in his face and never even catch a glimpse of the World’s Most Famous Arena.

Jimmer Fredette – 6’2” PG - BYU: Jimmer was the 2010-2011 NCAA division 1 player of the year. He led the nation in scoring, and carried BYU into the sweet 16 of the NCAA tournament. When Jimmer was on, he was lights out. The dude could score from 35 feet away, no problem. And for a white boy, he has a pretty diverse set of basketball moves. He’s not afraid to drive to the hoop, and can score at will. His downfall is defense. With all that energy he expends dropping 30 a game, Jimmer is left utterly useless on the defensive end. The dude can’t guard a barn. If I got the ball first in a game of one-on-one, I’d probably beat little Jimmer. On paper, this pick makes perfect sense for the Knicks. They run an offense-first, defense-seventh, type of game. They’d gladly give up 120 points to the Raptors, knowing damn well that they can throw up a buck thirty no big deal. The thing is, I actually don’t see Jimmer fitting in well with the Knicks. Chauncey is their man at the point, and Jimmer is too small to play shooting guard. Plus, there aren’t enough shots to go around, with Stat and Melo averaging 25 PPG, to quench Jimmer’s insatiable thirst for scoring. If Jimmer’s still on the board at 17, we say: PASS!

Man Hub’s NBA comparison = Glorified JJ Reddick

Kenneth Faried – 6’8” F – Morehead St.: Do you remember Louisville’s first round game in the NCAA tournament? I do. Let’s not even call this a game. It was an ass-fucking of epic proportions at the hands of 13-seeded Morehead State. I distinctly recall this guy Kenneth Faried, looking like Lil’ Wayne on steroids, just straight beasting the offensive and defensive glass, imposing his manhood on a more talented, but less hungry Louisville team. Faried was a force to be reckoned with against a top talent program like Louisville. He played outstanding defense, hustled, blocked shots, rebounded, and dunked his way into the 2^nd round of the tournament. At that point, I was drawn to him. I thought to myself, wow, the Knicks could really use someone with such heart. Sorry Ronny Turiaf, but you don’t have half the heart of Kenneth Faried (pun intended). The Knicks DESPERATELY need a player who doesn’t mind getting a little dirty, someone who enjoys boxing out, playing defense, and hustling on every single possession. If Faried is on the board at 17, we say: DRAFT

Man Hub’s NBA comparison = A less annoying Joakim Noah

Mavs vs Thunder Game 2

There is really no reason to write a full recap of this game. A few things of importance happened, but if you watched this game last night you witnessed one of the manliest dunks of all time. Just look at that picture for a minute. Brendon Haywood is 7 feet tall. Kevin Durant is so high in the air that Haywood might as well be checking his belly button for lint instead of trying to stop this dunk. Durant is eye level with the rim. Just absolutely posterizing poor Haywood. And as Jeff Van Gundy and Mark Jackson said last night, Durant should have been able to say whatever he wanted and the refs should have just turned the other way and not given Durant a technical foul. "Hey Brendon, I am going to have sex with every member of your family tonight and make you watch while you cry in the corner." Perfectly acceptable. Haywood would feel less violated if that actually happened than he did after he got his man card revoked on national televison. He is going to have nightmares of giant Durantulas spinning webs around him, paralyzing him, and throwing down right in his eye. Poor guy.

Anyway, the Thunder won, and don't think for a second it had nothing to do with Russell Westbrook being on the bench for the entire fourth quarter. Yes he was an All-Star, and he was better with shot selection last night, but if he was in during the fourth quarter he would have done what he always does. Run down the clock and force bad shots with only a couple of seconds left on the shot clock. On a more serious note, James Harden's beard is getting pretty serious. Why is he not on Brian Wilson's level yet? Just because Wilson is a certified nut job shouldn't affect beard status. It might not be as large yet, but it is just perfectly kempt. It is time Harden's beard got some love. I got your back James.

Oh and Dirk missed a free throw and the entire state of Dallas broke the world record for most people gasping in disbelief at the same time

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Wants a Statue

So Kareem has been openly complaining lately about the fact that he doesn't have a statue outside of the Staples Center in Los Angeles. From Espn, "I don't understand [it]. It's either an oversight or they're taking me for granted." He goes on to say that he feels slighted by the organization and that it doesn't make him happy. Boo fuckin hoo Kareem, you don't have a statue outside the arena that drunk Laker fans can take pictures in front of pretending to block your shot, or fondle your balls, or whatever people take pictures of these days. Man up, be happy with all your rings, and don't make yourself look like a giant douche by complaining that there is no bronze replica of yourself for all to worship.

Those were my original thoughts. Then I remembered something. Something that proves to me, and should to you, that Kareem Abdul-Jabbar deserved a statue. It is this simple, Kareem taught Uncle Jessse how to ball. Jesse was lost before Kareem showed up. Shooting air balls, shooting over the backboard, just really brutal stuff. Then Kareem comes along, tells Uncle Jesse he needs to find his sweet spot, and BAM! Unlce Jesse starts hittin jumpers like Reggie Miller at Madison Square Garden.

Now I don't know if you remember the rest of this episode, and I don't know why the dipshit filming this off of his TV didn't roll the film a little longer, because clearly he has no life if he is filming Full House episodes off his TV, but Uncle Jesse nails the winning jumper in some basketball game that he, Uncle Joey, and Danny are playing in. Then I'm sure he goes and gives Becky a kiss, says "Have meeeercy," and the episode ends. He is the hero and it is all because of Kareem Abdul Jabbar. I mean if that doesn't get him a statue, what the hell will?

Heat vs Bulls Game 2

I didn't watch much of the Heat's victory over the Bulls last night because I was busy watching Jurassic Park on ABC Family. From the few minutes I did see of the game, Lebron and D-Wade were dominating in transition. Pretty much just running through the Bulls on one man fast breaks. I have no idea if this was an actual trend of the game, or just the two minute stretch that I saw. I don't care, because as Charles Barkley said the Heat are a bunch of whiny, arrogant, assholes who only care about themeselves. Ok maybe I am paraphrasing a little.

Let's talk about Jurassic Park. What I want to know is how the hell is this movie not on IMDB's Top 250? Jurassic Park is rated a 7.9, falling just short of making the top 250. So I suggest whoever is reading this goes on the site immediately and rate this cinematic masterpiece a 10 and get it on the list where it belongs. There is just no way a movie called Duck Soup can be on this list ahead of Jurassic Park.

I remember when this movie came out, my dad came and picked me up from school during recess to go see it. While little Matthew and Emily were busy learning simple subtraction or whatever the hell you learn in the first grade, I was being a boss watching a PG-13 movie, gettin my popcorn on in the middle of the day. What's that first grade teacher? Am I leaving early because I am sick? Fuck no, I feel fine, now get off my back and let me watch some dinosaurs.

On to the movie itself. This is a manly man's movie. I mean, did you see that blood sucking lawyer gettin eaten off the crapper? Classic. Raptors just sneaking up on people and eating their faces off. By the way, shouldn't Muldoon, the god damn Raptor expert, have known that the attack was going to come? Maybe he should have spent a little less time shopping for clothes with Steve Irwin, and a little more time studying the behavior of the deadly dinosaurs that he is in charge of.

I could go on forever talking about this movie, but I am not going to. Quick side note, did you know that the little boy Tim grew up to play the Sledge Hammer in HBO's mini series The Pacific? Crazy shit. My man survives a T-Rex attack, falling out of a tree with a car chasing him, getting electrocuted, being trapped in a kitchen with two Raptors and his dumb bitch of a sister, AND World War II. Thats a man for you right there.

Mavs vs Thunder Game 1

Even though I said I didn't care who won this series, which is still true, that doesn't mean that I am not going to watch it. And I am glad I watched last nights game to witness one of the greatest shooting performances in the history of the NBA playoffs....JJ Barea just couldn't miss. Weaving in and out of the defense, hitting floaters and threes like he was playing on the beautiful out door courts of Puerto Rico, and not in Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals.

In all seriousness, that little guy can ball, but this game was obviously about Dirk Nowitzki. The big German scored 48 points, on 12-15 shooting, and an NBA postseason record 24-24 from the free throw line. The previous record for most free throws made without a miss was held by dickbag Paul Pierce when he went 21-21 in 2003. We can get into my hatred for Paul Pierce at another time.

Dirk was and is completely unguardable. Serg Ibaka could have been inside his uniform and it wouldn't have mattered. When Dirk is making jumpers there is just nothing a team can do about it. The announcers on ESPN were calling for the Thunder to send help for Ibaka more often, but double teaming Dirk won't accomplish much of anything. His strength is his ability to get his shot off up and over defenders because of his high release, so shooting over two defenders is no different than shooting over one.

On the Thunder side, Kevin Durant did work as he always does, putting up a very impressive, yet completely overshadowed 40 points, to go along with 8 boards and 5 assists. Who knows how many points he would have put up if Russell Westbrook actually gave him the ball. I have never seen a more selfish point guard than Westbrook. He takes horrible shots, and completely ignores Durant when he is calling for the ball. If I was the coach of the Thunder, who looks like a miniature version of Liam Neeson, I would remind him that he has the best scorer in the NBA on his team, stop taking shitty shots, and give him the damn ball. Or else he should get the real Liam Neeson to karate chop his throat until the lesson is learned. And yes, I know Westbrook just had only the 5th triple double in Game 7 history, but Derek Jeter hit two home runs on Mother's Day, and what as he done since then? Unless Westbrook changes the way he plays, it isn't going to matter if Dirk averages 10 points the rest of the way, the Thunder will have no chance.

NBA "Lottery" Decided Tonight

So the Western Conference Finals get under way tonight, who is going to win? I don't really care. No matter who wins Kevin Durant will still show up to his press conferences with his back pack strapped tight, looking like he is on his way to his biology final.

The big news tonight however, is that teams in the lottery will find out their positions in this years NBA Draft. With Harrison Barnes, Jared Sullinger, and Terrance Jones all going back to school, a weak draft class has become even weaker, and has turned this lottery into one of the worst in recent memory. Winning this lottery is going to matter as much as winning "Most Injury Prone," in your high school year book. The winner isn't going to be happy now, and will still hold a grudge five years later.

The top pick figures to either be Kyrie Irving of Duke, or Derrik Williams of Arizona. While both are very good players, neither are good enough to turn a franchise around. And even with a weak draft class, every draft has players that turn out to be very good pros, but other than these two, are there any future all-stars in this draft? It doesn't look like it, unless Jimmer becomes a complete player or Kemba decides to play every game of his career like its a Big East Tournament game.

So good luck, Minnesota, Cleveland, Washington, Sacramento, and whoever else sucked in the NBA this year. The 2012 lottery is only a year away.